The Voice in the Mirror

Why It’s So Hard to See Ourselves With Kindness

It never fails.
During photo session reveals, there’s always this one moment.

We’re looking through image after image—soft smiles, powerful stares, laughter frozen in time—and then suddenly, the voice arrives.
Not mine. Theirs.
The inner critic.

“She looks cute… but why is my arm doing that?”
“Ugh, I should’ve worn different pants.”
“My smile looks weird in this one. Delete it.”

It’s a vulnerable thing, seeing ourselves through someone else’s lens—especially when that lens is full of love, softness, and celebration. We’re not used to it. We’re used to adjusting, apologizing, covering, shrinking. When someone finally shows us what’s already beautiful, it can feel… almost suspicious.

But here’s what I want you to know: that urge to nitpick? It’s not you.
It’s a story you’ve been handed. One that says your worth depends on perfect angles, flawless skin, and “appropriate” clothes. That you’re only lovable when you’re polished and tucked in. That joy or sensuality or color is only for certain people in certain bodies.

And it’s a lie.

When we pause together during reveals, I invite my clients to breathe. To really see themselves. Not the checklist of “fixes,” but the feeling. The story their body tells. The softness. The strength. The aliveness.

Because that’s what this is really about.
Not posing. Not perfection.
But presence.

If your first reaction to a photo is criticism, don’t be ashamed. That voice has been with you for a long time. But you don’t have to believe it anymore. You can choose to see yourself with new eyes—and maybe even some grace.

And if you’re not quite ready to believe that yet, that’s okay. I’ll believe it for you until you can.

❤️ Susie